When Eyes Speak: The Silent Language of Young Children

I go down the memory lane, when my son and I were together. He was 6-month-old, learning to sit, hold his head for a prologed time and co-ordinate his body. I still remember the first time he “told” me something without saying a word. We were sitting on the floor, surrounded by toys, when I noticed his gaze fixated on a bright red ball on the floor. He was still non-mobile, just able to sit. He didn’t point. He couldn’t crawl. Still learning to balance his head and coordinate his body whilst sitting with support. He just looked—again and again—with a shaking head- at that ball, then at me, then back at the ball. It was subtle, almost easy to miss. But in that moment, I realized he was speaking to me most powerfully.
This is the magic of non-verbal communication in young children. Before they can form words, they use their eyes, facial expressions, gestures, and even the tone of their babbles to connect with the adult. And when we notice and respond, something extraordinary happens “we build their brains”.
 
The Power of Serve and Return
 
In child development, there’s a concept called Serve and Return. Think of it like a game of tennis. A child “serves” by reaching out—maybe with a look, a sound, or a gesture. Adult "return” the serve by noticing and responding appropriately. It is not a mere communication. It is wiring their little brains for connection, learning, and emotional security.
 
These moments might seem small, but they are phenomenal. Every time I responded to my son’s non-verbal cue, I helped to build the architecture of his brain. Also, I was teaching him that his voice—spoken or not—matters.
 
Eye Pointing: A Window into the Child’s World
 
One of the most common and powerful non-verbal cues is eye pointing. A child might repeatedly look at a toy, a picture, or even a person, trying to draw our attention. It’s his way of saying, “Look at that!” or “I want that!” or even “I’m curious about this—will you explore it with me?”
When an adult recognises and responds to these cues—by naming the object, bringing it closer, or simply sharing in their interest—the adult is doing more than meeting a need. 
It’s showing the child that we see him, that we understand him, and that his thoughts and feelings are important.
 
Why This Matters So Much?

Understanding and responding to non-verbal communication isn’t just about being a “good” parent or caregiver. It’s about giving children the foundation they need to thrive. These early interactions shape how they see the world, how they relate to others, and how they learn.
And the best part? You don’t need fancy toys or special training. You just need to be present. To watch. To listen with your eyes as much as your ears. To respond with warmth and curiosity.
 
A Personal Invitation

So, the next time your child looks at something with intent, pause. Follow his/her gaze. Let that moment be a conversation. Because in those quiet exchanges, you’re doing something truly profound: you’re helping the little brain grow, one loving response at a time.
 
Let’s celebrate the silent language of our little ones. Let’s honour their eyes, their gestures, their unspoken words. Because when we understand their language, we give them the greatest gift of all—connection.